We've All Been There - The Public Meltdown

Have you ever found yourself in the cookie aisle with a screaming child looking around at all the other normal people (you know, the ones without kids) and think to yourself "What? That's not my kid!"  For a second you think about actually saying that phrase and walking away (c'mon, we've all been there).  But, of course, you can't walk away so you stand there, embarrased, pleading with your child and inevitably you give in just so the tantrum will STOP!  I see it happen at the grocery store ALL THE TIME!  It makes me cringe because I know that the same scenario will just happen again the next time.  I feel bad for the mom (or dad) and do my best to pretend like I didn't see anything so I don't add to their embarrassment.  So what are you supposed to do if you find yourself in this situation?  To spare yourself the embarrassment and nasty looks from those "normal people" I suggest you scoop up your child and walk right out of the store.  Will the tantrum continue?  OF COURSE because your child has not gotten what they wanted - those darn cookies!  What now?  This insomnia induced mini-post is about antecedent manipulations (i.e. what happens before the behavior) to avoid those tantrums in the future.

You are the walking, talking, breathing functional behavior assessor now and you need to assess the situation.  Review the data in your head:
Antecedent - You went down the cookie aisle, your child asked for oreos, you said "Not today."
Behavior - Your child screams "But I want cookies," and falls to the floor in an all out tantrum (screaming, kicking, crying)
Consequence - You left the store, or maybe you didn't but PLEASE tell me you didn't get him the cookies!       

The data tells us that the cookie aisle and you saying "no cookies" are the source of the problem.  So, you have some options:
A) Avoid the cookie aisle like the plague
B) Prepare your child by saying "We're going to go on the cookie aisle but we're not buying any today.  But if you are a good boy then when we get to the check-out line I'll get you a candy bar - or a soda, gum, tic tacs, whatever (reinforcement people!)
C) Why the heck did you bring that kid back to the grocery store?!  Oh sorry, I mean endure a tantrum (and the embarrassment) while you continue to shop
D) Go down the cookie aisle, throw some oreos at your child, and finish your shopping in peace

I hope you chose option B.  It was the only serious option.  And maybe next time you could bring some cookies in your purse.  'Cause sometimes a kid just needs a cookie:)

Let's develop a simple behavior plan...

So we last discussed that the first step before creating a behavior plan was to assess your child's behavior and take some data.  Behavior typically has 1 of 4 functions: attention, tangibles, escape, and sensory.  This week I'm going to create 3 sample behavior plans for a tantrum - one with the function of attention, one with the function of access to tangibles, and one with the function of escape from non-prefered activities.  These are very simplistic plans using only reinforcement and extinction. 

ATTENTION
Antecedent:  Mommy is cooking dinner in the kitchen.
Behavior:  Child comes into the kitchen and begins tugging on mommy's leg.  When mommy doesn't attend the child begins crying then falls to the floor kicking.   
Consequence:  Mommy stops cooking dinner and picks the child up saying "stop crying".   
Result:  The child stops crying. 
Function:  The child's tantrum successfully gained mommy's attention - both in the form of acknowledging the behavior "stop crying" and in the form of mommy stopping her current activity to pick up the child.
Plan of action:  First, decide on a replacement behavior.  For instance, the child wanted to be picked up so you may teach the word "up".  Try to do this during play time when the child is happy and not engaging in tantrum behaviors.  Tell the child to say "up" and immediately pick the child up to reinforce that behavior.  Practice this several times.  For young toddlers, their closest approximation may be "uh".  Next, when the child engages in tantrum behavior to gain your attention you should apply extinction - meaning that if the child wants attention then you do not provide any attention and do not pick the child up.  When the child becomes calm, prompt the child to say "up" and immediately reinforce this behavior. 

TANGIBLE
Antecedent:  Sister is playing with a toy that brother wants to play with.
Behavior:  Brother tries to take the toy away, unsuccessfully.  Then the brother begins to cry and hit his sister.
Consequence:  The sister gives the toy to her brother.
Result:  Brother's tantrum stops and he begins to play with the toy.
Function:  The child's tantrum successfully gained access to the toy (tangible).
Plan of action:  First, decide on a replacement behavior.  For instance, the child wanted the toy from his sister so you may teach the child to ask his sister to "share" or to say "please".  Again, try to do this when the child is engaging in appropriate behaviors and having fun, not when the child is in the middle of a tantrum.  Prompt the child to say the key word then immediately reinforce that behavior.  It helps if the other child is willing to do this but if not then mommy or daddy can share the toy.  Next, when the child engages in the snatching away and tantrum behavior to get access to a toy apply extinction - meaning DO NOT allow the child to have the toy.  When the child becomes calm, prompt the child to say the key words - "share" or "please" - and immediately reinforce the behavior.  Thank the child for asking nicely and have the other child share the toy.

ESCAPE
Antecedent:  Daddy says "time to do homework".
Behavior:  The child immediately says "No" and begins throwing toys, crying, and kicking.
Consequence:  Daddy says that we can do homework later. 
Result:  The child's tantrum stops and he continues to play with his toys. 
Function:  The child's tantrum behavior successfully earned escape from the homework activity plus the child continued to engage in the preferred play activity. 
Plan of action:  First, teach the child a replacement behavior.  For instance, the child did not want to do homework and wanted to continue playing so you may teach the child to ask for "5 more minutes, please".  This may not be acceptable in all situations but it is important that the child learns that sometimes you can delay non-preferred tasks.  It also leads us to preparing the child before transition.  It often helps to tell a child "In 5 more minutes, we're going to do homework", then "One more minute", and finally a 10 second countdown before putting away the toys and doing homework.  When the child engages in the tantrum behavior when told "time to do homework" you should apply extinction - meaning do not let the child escape doing his homework.  Hold the demand and put away the toys.  Inevitably the child will continue to tantrum and it will be impossible to do the homework under this circumstance.  This is why it is important to clean up the toys so that while the child is temporarily escaping homework, he does not have access to fun activities.  When the child becomes calm, prompt the child through the homework activity reminding them that when it is done he may go play.  "First homework, then play." 

Keep voting for the next topic: tantrums, diets, or eat your veggies!

So you've taken the data...now what?

Once you take some anecdotal ABC data you need to carefully look over the information.  What are you looking for exactly?  Consistencies and recurring themes.  For example, if your child always has a tantrum in a room full of people, chances are that room full of people is likely aversive (i.e. not pleasant).  When you move away from that crowd of people, does your child consistently stop tantruming?  Your child has just escaped an aversive stimulus (large crowd) and his tantrum behavior has been reinforced (i.e. it will likely occur again under the same set of circumstances).  Remember, one common function of behavior is escape (from homework, chores, people, etc).

Here is an example of what ABC data might look like:

Antecedent

Mommy says "time to put away the toys" 

Behavior

Child has a tantrum, crying, yelling "no", throwing toys     

Consequence        

Mommy says "okay, 5 more minutes to play"

What just happened?  Your child's tantrum stopped - success, right?  Not so!  Your child's tantrum behavior has just been reinforced and the next time you ask him to clean up his toys, he will tantrum again because he has learned that when he tantrums you will then allow him more time to play.  The function here is access to tangibles (i.e. toys) or it may be escape/delay of whatever activity comes next.  Here's what should happen: 

Antecedent

Mommy says "time to put away the toys" 

Behavior

Child has a tantrum, crying, yelling "no", throwing toys     

Consequence        

Mommy repeats the demand "time to put away the toys" and prompts the child through the task until complete. 

Did your child continue to tantrum?  Probably so.  Did the toys get put away?  Yes, though you may have helped your child by putting toys into his hand and moving them to the toy box.  Success?  YES!  Will your child tantrum the next time you ask him to put away the toys?  Well, that depends on how long his tantrum behavior has been reinforced.  Remember that extinction burst - where behavior may get worse before it gets better?  Just be consistent - keep the demand.  Eventually you won't have to help your child clean up.  Eventually your child won't complain while they clean up.  Eventually your child will comply with your demand to clean up the first time you ask.  

ABA is no easy task.  It is time consuming, it requires you to constantly assess your child's behavior, it is sometimes difficult to be consistent between parents and teachers.  The list goes on and on.  Is it worth it?  DEFINITELY!  I've seen these strategies work with toddlers, preschoolers, young children, teenagers, and adults.  I've seen these strategies work with children with special needs, children with attention deficit disorder and typically functioning children.  I've used these strategies with my dogs, my toddler, my husband, my coworkers, and that rude cashier at the grocery store.  ABA is an invaluable tool in everyone's life!